February Love {part two}

          When Joseph was born, I had a strong and distinct feeling that he had a very special purpose in this life.  There wasn't anything particularly remarkable about his birth (besides the fact that his was my first natural child birth and I had just experienced what it felt like to think I might, in fact, DIE).  I simply felt a closeness to his little spirit that caused me to feel overwhelmed with a sense of humility and love that this little boy was mine to care for on this earth.  I felt like being his mother was going to be a great blessing and privilege.  

I was right.

          Joseph's uniquely joyful disposition has been a ray of sunshine in my world in a way that I will always cherish.  There have been difficult days, moments of sadness and suffering, but this little angel has been a light of happiness and joy in my life that has helped carry me through.

This month we celebrated his birthday, feeling ever so grateful for his role in our family.  Joseph has a pure, kind, and unfailingly cheerful heart.  He is remarkably bright, spiritual beyond his years, and has exceptionally prolific creativity.  At his last parent-teacher conference, the first thing his teacher said to me was, "Joseph is amazing." 


Yes.  He really is:).

The only thing Joseph really asked for, what he wanted this year more than anything else...was a binder.  To organize his school work in.  Yes, he is special.  (Thank you, Ashton, for fulfilling his dream!)

Another DK Eyewitness book.

He loves his grandparents:).

This year he requested a "BYU" cookies-n-cream cake. (He has developed quite an obsession.)

Since we celebrated his birthday the night before, he needed a little something on his actual day of birth.  Here, his favorite homemade muffins for breakfast.

          With each year that passes I often wish I could turn the time back and have my squooshy, beaming, little buddy again.  But at the same time, I love watching him grow and learn and experience his life.  Sometimes when it is nice outside and he invites me to come watch him play basketball, I get to just sit and observe him and ponder about what else is in store for him in the years to come.  And when I see that infectious smile and hear the joy effusing from his laughter, I have a feeling I will be witnessing true greatness, whatever form that will be taking.  I can't wait to see it all happen:).

How we love our Joseph<3.

February Love: {part one}

          I love celebrating holidays, even the ones that don't have a whole lot of historical significance and essentially exist to boost the economy.  I mean, who thought up a match-making, arrow shooting, naked cherub?  

          Let's just be honest.  It's a little weird. And do I really expect my husband to purchase me a $60 bouquet of roses that will die within a week?  Or that $120 heart shaped diamond pendant from Kay Jewelers?  Give me a break! But somehow I still love even Valentine's Day.  

          Holidays allow my family to create traditions and rituals that bind us together and foster a sense of belonging to something larger than ourselves.  They also serve to break up the sometimes monotonous flow of life, giving our children something to look forward to and anticipate with excitement.  I do, however, want the holidays we celebrate to have some meaning.  With the major holidays, this is fairly easy to do.  But Valentine's Day is kind of a challenge, I've discovered.  My husband would probably say that sometimes I stretch things a little too far in order to extract significance out of a holiday that maybe doesn't matter all that much.  Like this month's attempt to have a perfect Valentine's Day where all my boys would have spent a couple of hours crafting creative messages to each other, each card with an appropriate amount of hearts and the color pink.  And sparkles...that would have been nice.  Instead, I had to remind myself that no, I don't in fact have daughters with natural proclivities toward expressing affection easily and innate desires to make things pretty.  I have boys.  They don't have a single glitter-bone in their bodies, and would much prefer their own method of saying, "I love you."  Like wrestling.  That apparently means the same thing as, "you are pretty cool and I love spending time with you."  

          And so on February 14th, besides their valentine's from me, Joseph was the only one to have a valentine to give every one.  Each of us received a 'Y' shaped piece of my scrap booking paper with a special message on the back.  Mine read, "Dear mom, I wish you never got set apart.  I love you.  Love Joseph."  I know that sounds pretty cryptic to most, but I knew exactly what it meant.  (I was recently released as the primary chorister in our ward and received a new calling in the Relief Society.  Joseph was telling me he missed me.)  Heart melt<3.   But I felt so sad that the other boys hadn't worked very hard to complete their cards, so after school I pushed them to spend some time at the craft table.  My efforts proved fruitless.  By the time their dad came to get them for President's Day weekend, they were still not done.  Oh well, I thought.  I guess next year might work out better.  

          But a few days later, something happened.  I developed a blood clot in my right leg and had to spend quite a large part of our President's Day in the hospital.  The boys were informed of this, and when they came home that night their faces were filled with looks of concern and love for their mama.  They were tender and kind, not just to me, but with each other.  The next day, Ashton gave all of us a valentine with a personal, thoughtful message to each one.  And that night, Talmage did the same.  It made me so happy.  

          Living with the male gender is a special experience for me.  I learn much, every day.  My little men have a difficult time showing affecting to each other, but they certainly feel it. And though they probably would not make valentine's for each other if I didn't persuade them, the fact that they do is indicative of the characteristics that make boys so special.  In addition to their great need to protect, solve, build, and conquer, they also have a tremendous desire to please.  They feel deeply, despite their inability to always express themselves naturally.  And I love that about them.  Their awkward attempts are endearing, and I just want to squeeze them.



Here's a look at our special love day...

Talmage likes days like this because it means he can have a real breakfast before he leaves for school at 7:00 a.m. 

Joseph loved the scratch-off message part.  Later, he colored it over again just so he could scrape the crayon away.

Good morning, Emery!!

I'm so sorry, sweet boy, that not every morning will be this awesome.

I love this little moment I stole:).  It's a little easier to show love for an adorable baby brother.

Of course, Seth and I enjoyed a wonderful Valentine's Day as well.  We opted for an evening-in, with Emery:).  We made dinner together, exchanged gifts, and just had a relaxing, quiet night with each other.  My husband had indeed bought me roses, and beautiful chocolate covered strawberries.  And, of course, right before bed I found my valentine card behind my pillow.  It was so sweet and sincere and made me feel so grateful to have such a loving, attentive man.

I usually make him a card, but this year wanted to do something a little different.  So I made him a "message in a bottle."  He thought it was pretty clever.  (Yes, very clever of whomever I stole the idea from on Pinterest!)

After "holiday days" like this one, I do wonder if it's worth the swollen legs and throbbing headache at the end of the day.  In addition to preparing all my family's special things I also had to give Ashton's class party, which always seems to introduce a whole new level of fatigue to the day.  So by the time I finally was able to sleep and there was quite literally nothing left of me, I did spend a few moments contemplating whether or not my efforts will mean anything in the end.  Twenty years from now, will any of this matter? Will my kids even care?  The truth is, I don't know.  But I do hope that even though they won't remember that I prepared heart shaped french toast with strawberry syrup for breakfast for Valentine's day in 2014, they will remember that their mom tried very hard to make holidays special for them.  And hopefully when they are in the midst of university or professional life and starting families of their own, they will feel a deep bond and sense of belonging to each other that will draw them together.  On their own.  Without mom's prompting.  If that is the outcome, then I will take the migraines and aching back.  Happily:). 

Boys are gross. And sweet:).

Yesterday morning as I was saying goodbye to my grade school goers, I went to give my first grader a hug and apparently squeezed out a burp.  Right in my face.  It smelled like old milk and cereal.  But it didn't end there...ooooh no.  My reaction elicited a burst of giggles from both boys who then proceeded to burp their way to and out the door.  

Yes, I live with sounds of all sorts, all the time.  Besides the obvious bodily function sounds, both real and re-created, I get car sounds, animal sounds, gun sounds, crashing sounds, automated basketball hoop sounds, wrestling sounds...it gets pretty interesting around here!  Though I will never understand the male fascination with sound effects, one thing I am learning to appreciate about this species is their need to be moving.  This I don't mind so much, because when they are active, the house is happier.  There is more of a risk of injury to each other or damage to decor, yes.  But the boys are in much better spirits when they are able to work up a sweat.  I don't know exactly why, but I have noticed, particularly in my almost teenager, that when laziness in the chosen time killer, the boys' attitudes begin to sink right along with their activity level.  

Enter...January.  The dreaded month of all things cold and dead.  If this snail paced time of year is coupled with static activity,  the outcome is a very unpleasant Barrus household.  And so, to help prevent mom's eyeballs from popping out of her face, January in our family means basketball.  Thank you, thank you, basketball!  Basketball means the boys are happier, the home is happier, and mommy is happier.  And, thanks to a busy schedule filled with practices and games, the bonus is that the month that normally moves slower than any other in the year tends to pick up it's pace just a little bit! Can't complain about that:).

First up, a little Ashton action:

Notice the stout young man he was assigned to guard.

Yeah, I think two of Ashton could fit into one of him.

But Ashton was not deterred.  With his defensive skills, he cowers to no one:).

Breaking to the basket...

And...

It actually does go in, though it looks undetermined here:).  I think I was maybe the loudest mom in the gym, much to Ashton's dismay.

Sadly, we don't have very good action photos of Talmage's games.  His get a little more intense, so we tend to forget that we need to be trying to get some good shots in. Here is a little of what we were able to capture:

Perfectly cool at the free throw line.

Saving the ball.

A lot of the boys have these "special" (translation: super expensive) socks that they all believe help them perform better.  Talmage jumped on that bandwagon.  We let him use birthday money to purchase his pair of magic socks.

Now, for some reason, here in Pleasant Grove there really aren't any team opportunities until kids are in the 3rd grade.  But that doesn't stop Joseph from getting in on the fun whenever he gets the chance.  Church play is something we do quite a bit when there aren't games or practices happening, and this little guy simply tears it up!  He will cheerfully attempt basket after basket...after basket, after basket...until he makes one.  Then he repeats the process without a hint of discouragement.  He just loves it.  I love to watch him:).

(Oh dear.  Why yes, that is a chubby mommy in the background.)

And my favorite.  Love Dad's face in this one:).

             

I just adore Emery's little gym suit:).

A little speed...

 And just like that, January is now over.  Thank goodness for a condensed following month to help us cruise even a tiny bit closer to spring when these four boys can become reacquainted with the outdoors.  Such a blessed day it will be.  


Until then, it's all about teaching these boys how to express loooove to each other:). (Yeah for February!).  Joseph has this skill pretty much nailed.  He was just born with an ability to love unconditionally.  He was putting the finishing touches on his valentines for everyone last week.  The other boys may require a little more nudging in the paper heart department, but I'm sure come Feb. 14th they will have some kind of offering to give one another.  

You know, another thing I have learned about boys over the years is that while they love to display toughness and grit on the outside in order to establish dominance, they also have big, squooshy hearts that can love tenderly and forgive easily.  Yes, boys are gross (no, they reeeeally are), but they are also just big sweethearts in disguise.